Most of my life I’ve been wrestling with gods and with demons. I’ve spent just as much time on prayerful knees as I have shaking my fist at the heavens. It has taken me a long time to get to the place where I am today, at complete peace with my belief system.
That being said, I think it’s time. I’m starting a new religion! I’m not sure what to call it, though. Maybe I’ll just call it FLUGGism, after FLUGG, the main deity.
In order to be a member you have to have a personal relationship with FLUGG. You must put your trust in FLUGG and know that all will be just as it should be. Be still and know that FLUGG is.
Who and what is FLUGG? Look inside yourself and you will see. FLUGG is whatever you choose to believe in: Fate, Luck, the science of the Universe, God or Goddess.
Here’s how it works, the Golden Rule of FLUGG: You choose to believe whatever you want to believe. I will choose to believe whatever I want to believe.
For clarification you can refer to the following commandments.
1. Don’t be a dick. Just be nice. Ideally, all of the time. Ideally, to everyone you come in contact with. Even the assholes.
2. If you find yourself trying to change someone else’s mind, change yours instead. And by the way, stop doing that. Stop trying to change people’s minds. You don’t get extra points for conversions.
3. If you think you’re right and someone else is wrong, then you are definitely wrong. Because you are both right. Because FLUGG.
4. Stop judging. Everyone already has a judge. Their FLUGG is their judge. You have your own FLUGG to deal with.
5. There is one road to salvation, and that road is called “your life”. Search for salvation while you are alive and you will find it. You will find a little bit of it every day in the things that make you happy, the things that you love. Find it in music, in relationships, in church, in exercise, in relaxation, in books, in service, in nature, in food, in non-attachment, in meditation, in material possessions. Find it wherever the FLUGG you can. But remember, just be nice about it.
If you’re interested in joining me, maybe we can get together some time and not talk about what we believe. Have a FLUGGing meeting. Share a little bit of salvation over a beer. Or not. Whatever. Do what you want.